10 Red Flags of Dating - Pt 1
Dating today has become a bit of a hit or miss experience. There are many platforms you can choose to facilitate you efforts. However, whatever platform you choose - online dating, social events, or traditional dating methods, you’ll need to be prepared for possible red flags. This blogpost will cover the first 5 red flags.
They are as follows:
1. He’s only calls or visits late at night. There’s a word for this type of visit. Yes, we all know what it is. So, we may as well come out and say it. It’s a booty call. As I mentioned previously, anyone who wants to spend time with you should be proud to show you off to the world.
Furthermore, you should see this behavior as highly unacceptable and a complete insult to you personally..
Don’t find yourself settling for whatever time he has left over or for whatever little piece of him you can have. This may be hard to believe, but some women have never seen the man they’re so called dating in the light of day.
Think more highly of yourself. See yourself as a person of value and importance. After all, if you don’t take yourself seriously how can you expect someone else to.
2. He asks to borrow money. Ok, what type of man would take the liberty of asking for money and feel it’s is ok. How is this person seeing you?
Is he not aware that the dating period is a time that should be used to impress you and win your trust and confidence? A request for a loan hardly contributes to this cause.
Be sure you’re not sending any messages that encourage this. You may be someone who feels this is ok. If this is the case, I think you should think about the roles and responsibilities you want to have in the relationship. You’ll find that usually when this happens it becomes a habit that turns into a burden leading to frustration. Trust me it’s best not to go there. So, as far as the issue of money is concerned, he should not ask, and you should not offer at any time of the relationship.
In the future we’re going to be discussing this issue of self-esteem and confidence because it seems to be something many women have lost. This subject is highly critical as it is a major factor in the decisions we make.
3. He won’t take you out. – Fine. Find someone who will. What are your reasons for dating? Let me guess. You want to have someone to enjoy the things you love in life. You, no doubt, have a wide variety of things you enjoy doing as well as places you love to go, and you don’t want to do these things alone.
Don’t lose sight of your objective and purpose for dating. If you find that the experience is not what you had in mind it would be best to take steps toward a relationship that brings personal fulfillment and satisfaction.
4. He’s violent. – This is the single most important red flag we’ll discuss. Although violence is a threat to our well-being, it is behavior that is accepted and expected by many women. No one expects to encounter someone who’s violent or someone with intimidating behavior. However, we can very quickly find ourselves face to face with this oppressing and fearful situation.
When someone is violent or intimidating it will put you in - and keep you in - a defensive place. It will rob you of your freedom, joy and peace. The primary purpose of a violently aggressive person is control. No one wants to be controlled. You must take action immediately when you see even the smallest signs of aggression as these situations tend to escalate.
The longer you remain in the situation the harder it’s going to be to break free because like a bad storm - the power of imitation gains strength with time particularly when met with no resistance..
Never make excuses for someone’s violent behavior or put yourself in harms way. This person, I don’t care who they are, isn’t worth it.
5. He’s seeing others – Again, look at your objectives. Did you intend to date someone who’s all over the map or did you want a one-on-one relationship with growth potential and a possible future.
It’s time we start linking a person’s behavior with their character. All behavior, positive and negative, comes from the core or depth of the person’s being and each person is defined by what is in the heart and mind. Therefore, All negative behavior speaks against his character and reveals his heart concerning you.
There’s a lot going on out there these days. Men have a lot of information at their disposal – between the internet and women with low self-esteem throwing themselves at them – it’s a great temptation. But, let’s face it, If he can’t be a faithful date, he may have difficulty being a faithful husband. Remember, at the end of the day it’s a matter of trust.
Closing Tip
Date men that have your best interest at heart.
Don’t place yourself in harm’s way.
Don’t lose sight of your objective for dating.
Closing
Stay Tuned for Pt 2